Despite ending in 2004, Friends has maintained a surprisingly strong grip on people who have zero problems repeatedly watching all 236 episodes. To the point where hypothetical Friends-themed karaoke bars would be filled with people performing classic quotes like “Dear God, this parachute is a knapsack!” Thankfully, the show’s licensing has gone wild, giving fans tons of merch to obsess over, such as the excellent Funko Pop collectibles celebrating the six main Friends characters: Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Ross, Chandler and Joey. (As well as Marcel, Duck and Chick.) But, uh, we need a lot more than that.
As excellent as both of the Friends Funko Pop sets characters are, especially the Joey figure wearing Chandler’s clothes, it’s still strange that the second series only featured different versions of the core sextet, rather than any of the many memorable side characters that had us laughing during the ten-season stretch. Rather than complaining about that or the lack of Friends on streaming platforms, I’m going to gather all the Fun Bobby vibes I can to point out the 14 Friends Funko Pops that I can’t believe haven’t been made yet.
1. Dr. Drake Ramoray
This Friends Funko Pop is no mere alternate take on Joey Tribbiani, but rather a tribute to his Days of Our Lives neurosurgeon whose brawn outmatched anything involving brains. Speaking of, the Drake Ramoray figure should definitely have some stitches across his head as a reminder of the brain transplant that brought the character back to life, five seasons after he’d fallen down an elevator shaft and was presumed dead. He should also have his trusty stethoscope, and perhaps a slip of paper featuring the name and number of Brooke Shield’s dangerously obsessive Erika Ford.
2. Janice Litman-Goralnik
Oh. My. God. How in the world did Janice not get immediately fast-tracked for a Funko Pop doll the moment they were brought into existence? In the first place, these collectibles don’t make any noise, so Janice’s ear-gouging laugh wouldn’t be on aural display. Second, without a Janice figure, who’s going to make Funko Pop Chandler’s balls crawl back into its body? A Mattress King sign would be a nice accessory for this. Or maybe she’s missing one of her shoes, in reference to Chandler limply taking one as leverage during their Season 3 break-up.
3. Mike Hannigan
With the exception of his quasi-nemesis David (Hank Azaria), Paul Rudd’s Mike is easily the best boyfriend-turned-husband that Phoebe ever had, despite their relationship being based on one of Joey’s lies. Obviously, the most ideal look for Mike would be to have him wearing a shirt, or perhaps a sports jersey, that depicts his name as being “Crap Bag,” which he proposed as his new name when Phoebe changed hers to “Princess Consuela Bananahammock.” (In an episode that featured an early TV appearance from Craig Robinson.) Plus, Rudd needs more Funko Pops, since his only other one is for Ant-Man.
4. Copy Place Chloe
No other tertiary character has been at the middle of as many serious Friends debates as Angela Featherstone’s short-lived character Chloe, as she was the woman that Ross slept with when he was under the assumption that he and Rachel were on a break. It wouldn’t make much logistical sense to have her Funko Pop be in possession of the long-ass letter that Rachel wrote to Ross at the beach house, but it would be so fitting nonetheless. Perhaps she could come with an attachment of Ross’ apartment door to hide behind.
5. Eddie Menuek
Maybe Adam Goldberg’s Eddie wasn’t generally the worst roommate in the world, but he was definitely the worst replacement for Joey. Not only because he felt comfortable watching Chandler sleep, though that is a high qualifier. The Eddie Funko Pop should definitely be holding either a fruit dehydrator or, at the very least, a platter of dehydrated fruit. Perhaps Eddie could even have a wet fish tail dangling out of his pocket, since that’s how he chose to transport his pet after being kicked out of the apartment.
6 & 7. Amy & Jill Green
It’s our first Funko Pop pairing! Here we’ve got Rachel’s two sisters, Amy and Jill, played respectively by Christina Applegate and Reese Witherspoon. Each sister only showed up for two episodes apiece, and Applegate and Witherspoon never actually appeared together in the same one. So this would create the perfect opportunity for fans to have all three Green siblings together, so long as Jill doesn’t try to make out with Ross and max out anybody’s credit card. I’m thinking Amy should either come with a broken china plate or a tiny ear-piercing kit.
Like Dr. Drake Ramoray, Russ is no mere double of a previously released Ross Funko Pop, but a full character on his own. It’s just…one that happens to look a lot like Ross, or perhaps Bob Saget (or even Fun Bobby, if we’re just talking jackets and hair). The Russ collectible should definitely have a bigger nose and chin than Ross, and would also be pretty cool if he had a tattoo of Lauren Tom’s Julie somewhere, since those two ended up getting together after Rachel broke up with him.
9. Carol Willick
As Ross’ first wife who divorced him after embracing her latent lesbianism, Carol was truly one of a kind. (Also, because Ross was sober and got her name right at the altar, which wasn’t the case for his other weddings.) Carol is a no-brainer for Funko Pop collectibles because they could release the main version based on Jane Sibbett, who portrayed her in all but one episode, and the company could then follow that with a limited release of Anita Barone’s Carol, who was only used in a single episode. Then, of course, they could release a dual-character package with Carol and Jessica Hecht’s Susan on their wedding day. $$$!
10. Charles Bing (Helena Handbasket)
If we’re being real here, this entire list could have featured solely Funko Pops based on all the parents of the Friends leads. But the parent who would create the most magnificent looking figure is obviously Chandler’s cross-dressing father Charles – stage name Helena Handbasket – as played by Kathleen Turner. Like quite a few elements from Friends’ ten-year run, Charles is a particularly un-P.C. character, but considering the Funko Pop would only need to convey Turner’s glorious visage, as opposed to the character’s backstory, it’d be less awkward to revisit on a daily basis.